Top Ten Signs It May Be The Apocalypse
10. Gas is now $6.66 a gallon
9. Earlier today George W. Bush correctly pronounced "Apocalypse"
8. The minute you finish washing your car, it starts raining, am I right, people? You know what I'm talking about?
7. On tonight's "Anderson Cooper 360," his head spun around 360 degrees
6. At lunch my alphabet soup spelled, "eat it"
5. People are actually buying a razor with five blades
4. Two words: Governor Schwarzenegger
3. While getting dressed, you discover pitchfork marks on your ass
2. Kenny Rogers knows when to hold'em and fold'em, but not when to walk away from plastic surgery
1. The Mets are in first place
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